What should I do if my parents don't let me stretch my ears?

Have you ever been in the situation where your parents (mom or dad) did not let you get piercings or stretch your lobes? 

I have been asked by many people through social media and email on how to help with this situation.

As much as I would like to walk right into your home and have a nice sit down at the dinner table with your parents, some steaks, and convince them to let you stretch your lobes or get some new piercings, I just cant do that :(

First off, I am over here in Michigan, 

Second, I can just write this nice post and tell you what I can and you can make your decision :)

Third, I'm not in the decision making business, you control your life and my opinion does not matter, neither does anyone else's :) You do what makes you happy!

Anyways here is one of the recent messages I received (highlighted in gray below)

"Hey guys!! I need some advice....my mom won't let me get gauges cuz she thinks they are stupid..any advice on how to get her to let me get them?? Thanks so much !!"


Here is what I replied

"Hi there, I would recommend just being yourself. No one knows you better than you do. I knew I was into it so I stretched my ears without my mother knowing. She found out later when I cut my hair and got mad, so mad. (Off script here, so fucking mad). Later on she was somewhat okay with it and understood I liked it. I was being myself and in the beginning it upset her but then she realized how important it was to me once I started getting more piercings, etc. But since I lived with her, had no bills I still respected her and did a few things for her around the house (Okay not actually a house, we were in an apartment). Today she still makes jokes about my ears (Like If I'm in the backseat she says she doesn't need me to move since she can see the cars behind us through my lobes) but that's okay, she just doesn't like them but I do. But she knows that its not her ears, their mine lol. Hope this helps."


To summarize this question of "What should I do if my parents don't let me stretch my ears?"

It is a complicated question that has pros and cons.

But you have to think,

Do you love your parents? yes, they did bring you to this world.

But, also you have the right to be yourself and go out into the world as you are (consequences may arise), even if it causes pain and discomfort or a relationship problem in the beginning you have to realize that is only temporary.

If you can deal with it for a while is totally up to you. Some people can not deal with it and don't like making their parents unhappy, but to others, like myself. I could deal with it, I knew what I wanted and I knew my mother would still love me deep down. She made me after all and I have done many things for her and I still will.


So what should you do if your parents don't let you stretch your ears?

You have to think,

what is your other alternative? not stretching your ears, you'll only regret not trying it when you were younger, but you could still stretch when you are older.

If you are someone with patience, then wait by all means till you're old enough.

If you do not learn patience then just do it, but understand consequences may arise.

You take full responsibility for your actions. Just be happy in the end and throughout the process. Life is fun :)


Tip: you could actually even sit and talk to your parents about it. If they're not willing to sit down to talk about it, then they still have some growing up to do themselves and use your best judgement.


Hope this helps you out, if you enjoyed this post, learned from it, or feel someone else could use it, please feel free to share and leave a comment :)


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Marcus - February 9, 2019

As a piercer I suggest you read up and show her the history in cultures all over the world behind stretched ears, my family is of Mayan Native American descent which it is a common practice to signify adulthood and class. I was also raised as a Buddhist which the Buddha is depicted with stretched ears as a symbol of patience and wisdom. Jewish slaves pierced and stretched their ears as a symbol of devotion to God, Yahweh.

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